StrokeSurvivorBlog

Four days after Steve’s right-brain stroke I found out that he was under a DNR – Do Not Resuscitate. The swelling in his brain was so great that the doctors were afraid that it might trigger a series of other strokes which would most likely prove fatal. I overheard the neurologist say to another doctor out in the hallway that if that happened, Steve was under a DNR.

Then I remembered that in the emergency room the night of the stroke, the neurologist asked him if he wanted to be resuscitated. Steve paused for a minute and then in his slurred speech said “No”. He couldn’t even think straight, so my daughters and I thought that was an odd question for the doctor to ask, especially since he failed to explain to Steve just exactly what that meant. But there was so much going on that we didn’t give it another thought. Little did we know that they put DNR on his chart and coded it on his wristband, so every time he was given any meds, that Do Not Resuscitate was indicated.

This so troubled me that the next morning I asked the hospitalist if the DNR meant that they wouldn’t even try CPR on him if he needed it, and he said that was correct. I told him that I was Steve’s healthcare agent and had the Power of Attorney for Healthcare, and I wanted the DNR removed. He argued with me for a minute or two until I told him that I knew what Steve’s wishes were because just 3 months earlier we discussed all of this when we made up a new Will, Living Will, Durable Power of Attorney for Healthcare, and Durable Power of Attorney (POA). I told him that I had all the paperwork with me if he wanted to see it. On that note, the doctor gave orders to remove the DNR and put Steve on a full resuscitate code. How invaluable that paperwork was, and little did we know that I would be using the POA so soon.

Why is it that most people procrastinate when it comes to drawing up a will or power of attorney for healthcare?

Three months prior to the stroke, we were helping Steve’s parents draw up their paperwork. Both of them were in ill health and we knew their documents needed updating. They were reluctant to hire an attorney because of the cost involved, so through some legal sources of mine I helped them find the right documents and did it for them according to their wishes. Since I had all the documents in my computer, I decided to update our paperwork as well. Everything was notarized and distributed to the alternate healthcare agents we designated.

On the POA for Healthcare you can designate a Statement of Desires, Special Provisions or Limitations. The issue of DNR – Do Not Resuscitate can be addressed here. In extreme terminal or comatose situations, many people do not wish to have their life extended by artificial methods.

Steve and I discussed these end-of-life questions, and the issue of being resuscitated was addressed. Knowing what his desires were prior to the stroke gave me confidence to make bold decisions for him. I was his advocate and I took that responsibility very seriously. I’m so glad we discussed these things in advance and had the legal documents drawn up.