http://www.strokesurvivorblog.com/2008/10/27/stroke-recovery-successes-and-setbacks/#utm_source=feed&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=feed Our Stroke Recovery Journey Wed, 08 Feb 2012 00:26:27 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 http://www.strokesurvivorblog.com/2008/10/27/stroke-recovery-successes-and-setbacks/comment-page-1/#comment-14889 Kathy Boncher Fri, 17 Dec 2010 04:15:19 +0000 http://www.strokesurvivorblog.com/?p=139#comment-14889 Kati, One thing I learned was that I couldn't force my husband to do therapy against his will. For the first couple of years after his stroke, I tried so hard to get him going and felt responsible to keep him motivated, and when he didn't want to do the exercises I would get frustrated with him. Well, that didn't work. First of all, men don't like to be told what to do, so I changed my attitude. I offered my help, but refused to get upset when he didn't want to do it. I learned that sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness. With my long forbearance and calmness of spirit he would be persuaded, and my soft speech broke down his hardened resistance. Not every time though, and it took much of my patience, but it worked better than nagging him. Your patience, praise, encouragement, understanding and love will go a long way, but the determination must come from within him. My husband struggles with much pain, so he doesn't want to do exercises unless I do most of the work for him. So I offer a reward for him doing even the simplest things...such as a back rub, leg massage, etc. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Kati, One thing I learned was that I couldn’t force my husband to do therapy against his will. For the first couple of years after his stroke, I tried so hard to get him going and felt responsible to keep him motivated, and when he didn’t want to do the exercises I would get frustrated with him. Well, that didn’t work. First of all, men don’t like to be told what to do, so I changed my attitude. I offered my help, but refused to get upset when he didn’t want to do it. I learned that sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness. With my long forbearance and calmness of spirit he would be persuaded, and my soft speech broke down his hardened resistance. Not every time though, and it took much of my patience, but it worked better than nagging him. Your patience, praise, encouragement, understanding and love will go a long way, but the determination must come from within him. My husband struggles with much pain, so he doesn’t want to do exercises unless I do most of the work for him. So I offer a reward for him doing even the simplest things…such as a back rub, leg massage, etc. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.

]]> http://www.strokesurvivorblog.com/2008/10/27/stroke-recovery-successes-and-setbacks/comment-page-1/#comment-14844 Kati Anderson Thu, 16 Dec 2010 04:39:35 +0000 http://www.strokesurvivorblog.com/?p=139#comment-14844 My husband Kurt age 49 suffered a large r mca stroke in April of this year. He is at out pt therapy 2 times a week, albe to walk with min assist, just starting to do stairs. I want him to be more excited about doing his home program with me, he was a runner before this 3-4 times at the gym. How did youo keep your husband motivated without getting him mad at you? Thanks, Kati My husband Kurt age 49 suffered a large r mca stroke in April of this year. He is at out pt therapy 2 times a week, albe to walk with min assist, just starting to do stairs. I want him to be more excited about doing his home program with me, he was a runner before this 3-4 times at the gym. How did youo keep your husband motivated without getting him mad at you? Thanks, Kati

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